Sometimes I’m not very pleasant to be around.  I’m working on it, but I have to tell you, it isn’t easy.

Monday evening, after traveling to Dallas for Perkins School of Youth Ministry, standing in line to register, sitting through 2 workshops, standing in line for lunch, sitting through 2 more workshops, we finally came to time for the opening worship service.

I was in no mood to worship (this statement alone is probably rich enough for a book, let alone a blog post), much less for the different type/style of worship that had been planned.

I sensed my curmudgeon-ness coming on and began to process it.  I’m a bit to grown up, supposedly too mature to act out the way I was feeling, and, besides, this was worship!

I sucked it up and had a great time and wonderful experience of worship.  In fact, just a couple of minutes in I was caught up in worship and the moment enough I wasn’t even aware of the attitude I had brought into that space.

Yet, here I am; having approached this afternoon’s time of worship feeling much the same way, I chose this time to sit out.

Sometimes I work on my attitude by choosing to act differently than I feel, and, in effect, “act myself out of” that attitude. Other times, I remove myself (politely and respectfully) from times and places because of my attitude.

God, please help me learn to be more contagious in my positive attitude moments than in my negative attitude moments.

One thought on “Curmudgeon

  1. I had the same attitude/feeling about worship two years ago in Dallas (where we met) at the covenant gathering for the Youthworker Movement. I absolutely didn’t feel like worshiping. I’d already been in one worship session and hadn’t liked it. For some reason decided to come in on the tail end of a worship session later in the event and experienced a powerful moment of community in worship.

    I guess I’ll never learn. 🙂

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