Not aimed at you

young-girl-cryingOnce I noticed the little girl crying, I could not not think about it.

Being at an elementary school to meet with a 4th grader I mentor, I was sensitive to the little girl’s privacy and space. Had this happened at the church I pastor, I wouldn’t have felt the same nudge to maintain my distance.

After all, at least two teachers had stopped to talk with her.

Her situation wasn’t desperate or an emergency, but I still could not really focus on anything else. After all, I’d just preached on our “participating in Christ’s suffering” in Philippians 3. Part of what Paul is writing about, I argued, is that we must be willing to feel.

And, oh, was I feeling. So I was praying.  But I wasn’t willing only to pray, so I decided I would ask a teacher.

I caught one of the teachers on lunch duty and asked. Of course, I started with, “I realize this may be none of my business….”

“She’s homesick.”  Then the teacher added, “and she sees these tables (where I was sitting) other parents come to see their kids, and it doesn’t help.”

I was an adult there to visit a child. Not my child. Yet, my actions, to a homesick little girl, could add to her feelings of homesickness. But my visit wasn’t aimed at her.

Almost every time there is a disaster somewhere, and someone gives thanks for being spared, someone else replies with some version of “Why are you thankful? Are you saying God struck down the people who weren’t spared?”

To be fair, with almost every disaster, it is a matter of minutes before someone somewhere casts judgment, and claims God sent the disaster.

But most of us, in expressing thanks, or in simply trying to do something good (like visit a child at lunch), aren’t aiming our intentions at you.

And I’ll try to remember this next time I’m the hurt or grieving one and I observe someone experiencing joy.

Because we all get to live both sides of this one.

 

Loving Las Vegas

A hand reaching out of a puddle in the forest.I’ve never been to Vegas, but after the mass shooting there last night, they’ve been on my mind and heart this morning. Enough that I posted this to Facebook this morning:

Praying for #LasVegas, and for a country that can seemingly agree on nothing except that we should pray.
Maybe that’s the best place to start.

Of course, sharing such a sentiment gets “likes” and positive comments.

And, then I read this post from my friend Jared Slack:

the fact there we’re all secretly hoping Stephen Paddock (Vegas shooter) is a by-product of our political/religious rivals is the problem.

After that bounced around in me for a while, I realized a potential shortcoming of my post.

I left it too easy for us to end up just praying for the other. Sure, “others” like victims, victim’s families, friends, residents of Las Vegas, the shooter and his family, friends, etc.

But if all we all agree to do is pray like that, for the other, whoever the other might be, I think we give in to remaining caught in this tragic cycle of simply agreeing to pray.

What if we moved a step further?

What if we invited God, in our prayers, to help us see the steps we, ourselves, can make beyond the impasse of only agreeing that we can and should pray?

If we remain in our place, disagreeing with so many others about so much, and only willing to agree to pray, I believe we find ourselves in the place of the Pharisee in this story from Luke 18

Jesus told this parable to certain people who had convinced themselves that they were righteous and who looked on everyone else with disgust: “Two people went up to the temple to pray. One was a Pharisee and the other a tax collector. The Pharisee stood and prayed about himself with these words, ‘God, I thank you that I’m not like everyone else—crooks, evildoers, adulterers—or even like this tax collector. I fast twice a week. I give a tenth of everything I receive.’ But the tax collector stood at a distance. He wouldn’t even lift his eyes to look toward heaven. Rather, he struck his chest and said, ‘God, show mercy to me, a sinner.’ I tell you, this person went down to his home justified rather than the Pharisee. All who lift themselves up will be brought low, and those who make themselves low will be lifted up.”

I hereby commit to continuing to pray for Las Vegas, victims, victim’s families and friends, Stephen Paddock, his family and loved ones.

I further commit to finding, meeting, interacting, and listening to some of the “others.” for whom I am praying. Let’s call this reaching out.

When I reach out, the place for me to reach out from is the recognition that something or some things about me and the way I view and move in the world might be part of the problem.

I am reaching out not only to help, but for help.

2017 version of Community Bathrooms

community bath 1 (2).jpgIn 1982, I made a conscious decision to move away from a dorm with semi-private bathrooms to a dorm with community bathrooms on each floor.

And I never looked back.  Ok; the bathroom set up wasn’t the reason I chose the other dorm (It helped they had installed air-conditioning over the summer).

Community was different in dorms with community baths.  Not in a creepy way, but in a way that comes sui generis from sharing tiolet, shower, shaving, washing space with a larger number of people.

We had challenges from time to time. I don’t actually remember having my stuff stolen while I was in the shower, but it may have happened. I also don’t remember stealing anyone else’s stuff while they showered. That may have happened, too.

But what I do remember happening was the shared vulnerability of such common spaces had the effect of each of us treating one another with at least a modicum of respect.

So, as a few of us chatted over coffee this morning, and remembered the days of community-bathroomed dorms, someone said, “I bet they don’t have those any more.”

Oh, but we do.

I don’t know if colleges do, but I contend that social media is the community bathroom of 2017. Except that, not realizing it, many of us have not yet learned to treat others with the modicum of respect deserved when an eclectic and random (you might have chosen your roommate, but you didn’t chose who got to live on the floor)

It took us some time to adapt to sharing the space of the community bathroom.

But not as long as you’ve been on social media!

Who are our customers?

Sermon #3 in our Branded series, preached Sunday, May 1 at Euless First United Methodist Church

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“I gave you a $20. You gave me change for a 10!”

One of the hardest lessons for me to learn working a counter register or the drive-through window at McDonald’s was “The customer is always right.” In this particular case, this is why we were trained to leave the bill or bills the customer gave us lying across the top of the cash drawer until after the exchange was complete.

Honestly, if you were selling $1000 an hour worth of McDonalds in the early 80’s, and we were, it was pretty easy to slip the bill into its slot and move on to counting out the change, and forget if they paid with a $5, a $10, or a $20. And it was pretty easy to miskey the amount tendered.

I’ll just admit this: it was pretty easy to make any of a HUGE variety of mistakes; which, I’m sure, is why every job a crew person could do at McDonald’s was laid out step-by-step.

But, really, “the customer is always right”?  If the customers know that, won’t they all try to take advantage of you?  

Apparently not.  Over the years and thousands of customers, I have no doubt that a few folk intentionally took advantage.  Most, though, were too busy just living their own lives to be constantly looking for ways to cheat or take advantage of others.

(If you feel strongly that everyone, or almost everyone is usually looking for ways to cheat or take advantage of others, I suggest what you are seeing is reflective of something within yourself)

So, this morning, let’s begin with this question, How does ‘the customer is always right’ figure into the metaphor we have been pursuing with this “Branded” sermon series?  

That question begs this additional question: who are our customers?

But, before we get to that, here’s a recap of the first two weeks of the series:  The BRAND we all share is that we are created in God’s very image as reminders for each other, and for ourselves when we look in a mirror, of who our Creator is. Even more than that, the BRAND we all share is God’s story; because a brand is not a picture or logo or song or video: a brand is the story evoked by the picture, logo, song, or video.

So we, as human beings, all bear the image of God, and this image is linked to God’s story. Here is a short version of God’s story (would you understand if I called it the “reader’s digest condensed version?)

Act 1: creation – good and very good! Act 2: sin, Act 3: Israel – God raises up a people to reach all the rest of the people Act 4: Jesus -Jesus becomes the faithful human in and through whom all are offered healing and hope from their sin Act 5: Church – Church is literally a  “called-out people” whom God intends to embody the Kingdom of God already present on earth, here and now.

That’s the Brand we all share.  Last week we built on this by defining the business we are in. We are in the business of making disciples of Jesus Christ, and we can only make disciples by being disciples. Being a disciple is really pretty straightforward: it is following Jesus.

The more and the more closely we follow Jesus, the more we will come to find ourselves becoming more like Jesus.

So, that’s the Brand we all share, and the business we are in.

Some of you may still be uncomfortable with the branding/business metaphor.  I use this metaphor based on the belief that Jesus taught in metaphors of fishing and shepherding and the like because that was the world he lived in.  I fully believe that if Jesus were here among us today, he would use metaphors that are familiar to us – among them, those of shopping, business, branding, and, though it is still difficult for me to admit this, consumerism.

Sticking with this metaphor, I ask you this morning, if our business is making disciples, then who are our customers?

I want to clarify this: Our business is NOT being disciples, but making them. Abraham’s mission in Genesis 12 was to

“Leave your land, your family, and your father’s household for the land that I will show you. I will make of you a great nation and will bless you. I will make your name respected, and you will be a blessing.

I will bless those who bless you,
   those who curse you I will curse;
       all the families of the earth
           will be blessed because of you.”  (Genesis 12:1-4)

Likewise, Jesus’ mission is well summed up in this morning’s Gospel reading:

God so loved the world that he gave his only Son, so that everyone who believes in him won’t perish but will have eternal life. God didn’t send his Son into the world to judge the world, but that the world might be saved through him.  (John 3:16-17)

And again, as Paul cites in Philippians 2:

Though he was in the form of God,
       he did not consider being equal with God something to exploit.
But he emptied himself
       by taking the form of a slave
       and by becoming like human beings.
When he found himself in the form of a human,
       he humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death,
       even death on a cross.
Therefore, God highly honored him
       and gave him a name above all names,
   so that at the name of Jesus everyone
       in heaven, on earth, and under the earth might bow
       and every tongue confess that
           Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.  (Philippians 2:6-11)

And leading into this magnificent poetry, Paul writes, “Adopt the attitude that was in Christ Jesus.”

So the customer is “all the families of the earth,” and “the world,” as in “that the world might be saved through him.”

Let me make this clear: like Abraham, Jesus, and Paul, We are NOT the customer.  We once were the customer, but, within this metaphor, we’ve been hired on, and now you and I are at the cash register ready to take people’s orders and do business for our brand.

Let’s pause for a moment and reflect on this truth: you and I are NOT the customer!  If we are already disciples of Jesus Christ, then we are no longer the customer.

A brief riff on what it means that we aren’t the customer.  Worship isn’t about what you and I “want.” You and I aren’t the audience in worship, even IF you are a customer – someone who hasn’t yet decided to follow Jesus.

It is too easy for us, as Christians, as followers of Jesus, to get caught up in what we want worship to be, what we think worship ought to be.  But remember, God is the audience of worship, not you and me.  What God wants in worship, what God wants from worship, is for us to acknowledge God. What God wants from worship is for God’s story to be remembered, recited, re-invigorated, carried forth into our lives and into the world.

This is HUGE!  This means that what we do here, for the brand, to “sell” the brand to others, or to make disciples, cannot be about what you and I want. It is about the brand and the customer.

Is the customer always right?  Honestly, no.  But few of us have the chops to decide when the customer is right and when he or she isn’t.

As a crew member at McDonald’s, I had to operate from the position of the customer always being right. When this got challenging, I couldn’t make the call, I had to call the manager, and let the manager decide.

I believe we should operate from the same perspective.

The manager was better trained to be able to do what really needed to be done if the customer was, in fact wrong, and that was to find a way to stand firm without alienating the customer.

If our customers are “everyone out there” who isn’t already a disciple of Jesus and who doesn’t have a church family, how do we find ways to interact with them where we can stand firm as disciples without alienating them?

I don’t know if this helps or not, but according to the Gospels, about the only people Jesus alienated are the really religious. Oh, yeah, and maybe that rich guy who didn’t want to share.

Sometimes, we as followers of Jesus wear our ability to alienate people like a badge of honor. When we do so, we are not serving the business we are in, and we are not following Jesus.

Looking at the gospel in the metaphor of sales and consumerism, the customer is anyone who has not yet accepted the Gospel as truth and began following Jesus.

Ah, but today’s gospel reading reminds us it isn’t only them, “out there” who are customers. Nicodemus was an insider.  He was a Pharisee, a religious leader. But Nicodemus recognized a disconnection between his own life and what Jesus was teaching, so he came to Jesus, humble, and curious, to learn. Perhaps, even, to follow, to become a disciple.

So, for the customers – all those out there and in here who are willing, like Nicodemus, to acknowledge a disconnection between their life and what Jesus is teaching, can we, as followers of Jesus, treat them, our customers, as if they are always right?

Even if we are firmly convinced they are NOT?

So, when in doubt; let’s check with the manager.  In our lives as disciples, Jesus is the manager.

When you find it most difficult to assume someone else is right, but your goal is to invite them, or win them, or convince them, to follow Jesus, it is on you to keep the conversation open.

If, that is, you want to make the sale. Which means you believe Jesus, and following Jesus, is a valuable experience that God, and you, want everyone to have. You are a disciple, and you want to make more disciples. That is the business we are in!

There are challenging people out there!  There are challenging people in here!  I personally have driven some of you near crazy!

And there are people in the world around us – in our community, in our schools, our neighbors, our co-workers, who make it really difficult for us to remember, sometimes, that Jesus loves them, too, at least as much as Jesus loves us.

So, when it gets difficult, invite Jesus into your challenge.

What do you think Jesus would say? That God so loved the world that he gave his only Son, so that everyone who believes in him won’t perish but will have eternal life. God didn’t send his Son into the world to judge the world, but that the world might be saved through him.

If they are part of “the world,” then God loves them, and sent Jesus for them, and they are our customer.

So, when you have trouble, don’t walk away from the sale, but invite Jesus in.

Our job is to treat our customers well enough that, even if they don’t get their money back, or their order corrected, or free food, they might still consider coming back.

Can you treat all customers in a way that even if they don’t buy what you’re selling this time, they might consider coming back another time?

Anyone who walked away from Jesus disappointed or their wishes or expectations unfulfilled was pretty clear it was on them, not on Jesus.

Can you and I learn to treat our customers this well?

Are you willing to live in this simple phrase from the Apostle Paul in Romans 12:18: If possible, to the best of your ability, live at peace with all people.

Let me put that in context for you:

9 Love should be shown without pretending. Hate evil, and hold on to what is good. 10 Love each other like the members of your family. Be the best at showing honor to each other. 11 Don’t hesitate to be enthusiastic—be on fire in the Spirit as you serve the Lord! 12 Be happy in your hope, stand your ground when you’re in trouble, and devote yourselves to prayer. 13 Contribute to the needs of God’s people, and welcome strangers into your home. 14 Bless people who harass you—bless and don’t curse them. 15 Be happy with those who are happy, and cry with those who are crying. 16 Consider everyone as equal, and don’t think that you’re better than anyone else. Instead, associate with people who have no status. Don’t think that you’re so smart. 17 Don’t pay back anyone for their evil actions with evil actions, but show respect for what everyone else believes is good. 

18 If possible, to the best of your ability, live at peace with all people. 19 Don’t try to get revenge for yourselves, my dear friends, but leave room for God’s wrath. It is written, Revenge belongs to me; I will pay it back, says the Lord. 20 Instead, If your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him a drink. By doing this, you will pile burning coals of fire upon his head. 21 Don’t be defeated by evil, but defeat evil with good.        (Romans 12:9-21)

Who are our customers?  Anyone, everyone who can become a disciple of Jesus Christ.  How do we reach our customer, how do we make them our customer – how do we convince them that they want – or need – what we have?

We begin by learning to do this: If possible, to the best of your ability, live at peace with all people.

I feel compelled to add this: we cannot let ourselves off so easy on the “to the best of your ability” part.  If you follow Jesus, you don’t get to throw up your hands and say, “well, I’m just a sinner,” or
“That’s just the human condition!” or whatever other line you and I use in our heads to cop out on following Jesus.

One of the worst is “Don’t look at me, look at Jesus!” Oh, pullease! No one will look at the Jesus you point to over there if that Jesus looks a lot different from the one you are modeling.

We owe it to our customers – to those we would reach for Christ; we owe it to God – to welcome God’s transforming power into our lives so we can say, “this following Jesus thing that I am trying to sell you, look at how it works in my life!”

And, to close, one of the most obvious ways you and I, as followers of Jesus, can “to the best of our ability, live at peace with all people.”

Will you join me in refusing to participate in the demeaning name-calling and venom-spewing that is our presidential election season?